On Saturday, I have a speaking engagement. The topic is “Being the Friend I Need.” As I practiced, I began to feel sorry for myself. I have no friends, I thought.
Don’t freak out on me if you’re one of my friends. Keep reading. It will (hopefully) get better.
I know I have friends. I have deep lasting friendships with people who would drop everything and come at a moment’s notice. And I am grateful for that. I also have friends with whom I can schedule a evening out and spend hours gabbing and eating and laughing and eating. And I love that.
What I was feeling was that I didn’t have spur-of-the-moment, just-touching-base-to-see-how-you’re-doing friends, the kind of friends you call when something irritating or funny happens in your day and you just need to share it. And I missed that. I’ve missed it, honestly, for as long as I’ve lived back in Pennsylvania.
I was talking it out with Les tonight, because talking is often how I process things (poor, but patient, saint of a man). And as we talked I realized that I’ve felt this way for about as long as I’ve been on Facebook. Eureka. No one needs to call me to share that funny little thing; we share it on our walls. When I’m frustrated, I can rant on Facebook and someone will agree with me and someone else will say something to knock me out of my snit.
I still have spur-of-the-moment, just-touching-base-to-see-how-you’re-doing friends. We’re simply touching base on Facebook rather than by phone or e-mail. And we’re probably touching base more often. We’re sharing more, even if my feelings haven’t caught up with that.
Yeah, I still wish there were people I could call at the last minute for a Panera run or a trip to the mall. But I think that frustration is due more to my work-from-home situation than it is to my friendships. I do miss the personal, daily, incidental interaction with humans at the office on a daily basis.
So maybe I’ll start thinking of Facebook as my water cooler. See you there at 9:30 tomorrow, friend. Can’t wait to hear all the news.